People Who Live In Permanent Indecision
“I do what I do because it is what I have to do.” Perhaps you have heard this phrase on different occasions and the truth is that it enunciates one of the most powerful motives, duty, with which we human beings arm ourselves to act. A powerful reason to get going in the face of permanent indecision, which can grow from the seeds of lack of motivation and disinterest.
The pacifist leader Indira Gandhi once said that ” you cannot be a prisoner of indecision, because in it all the doors remain open. ” A phrase that alludes to a thesis that psychology has later confirmed: the increase in the number of options increases our indecision; an indecision that, in turn, can lead us down unpleasant alleys. Think that inaction, in the long term, is not a good adviser, so below we show you several of the arguments that indicate it as such.
Your reality is full of decisions
Maybe one day you managed to finish your studies. At one point in your life, you had children, got married, or decided not to share your world with a partner. On some occasion you chose a job or a friend … All of them decisions that in some way today are inscribed and configure your current reality. If you don’t think so, imagine what your world would be like now if you hadn’t made any of these decisions ; Think about how your life could be if all these momentous actions had been taken by other people for you.
Now, I would like to propose you another idea. What if after making a decision, your mind becomes a hotbed in which the bubbles are all the decisions you could have made? Take, for example, in the case of a young man who has decided to study psychology, how would he feel afterwards if he then turned his attention to critical thoughts, such as that he should have chosen a more practical career, with less unemployment or better paid ?
What happens if we live in permanent indecision?
To answer the questions raised here, I think it is a good idea to turn to the theories of Anthony Robbins. The famous speaker and coach puts it simply, stating that ” the lack of clarity more than anything else, is the main cause of failure of people. ” When Robbins speaks of failure, he is not referring to a job or business that did not go well. When this coach refers to failure, he is saying that if we are not determined, we will fail in everything, be it a friendship relationship, a life as a couple, a project, a dream …
Therefore, Robbins asks himself a question, what makes us unable to make decisions? For this question he finds two interesting answers. Thus, I propose that we see them:
The fear of being criticized
One of the answers that the coach finds for us to live in permanent indecision is found in the fear of criticism. As social beings, many times we think that doing this or that is not going to please other people.
At this point, we have to think that 7 billion people live in the world, each unique and with their personal opinion. Of course, what you do is not going to appeal to many other people! But there will be those who do enjoy it and are attracted to it. So what other people think should never be a reason for inaction. In fact, the Mexican millionaire Carlos Slim expresses it with a lapidary sentence: “when you live for the opinion of others, you are dead.”
Fear of failure
Another important reason, according to Robbins, why we would settle into permanent inaction would be the fear of failure. Thus, it would be the anticipation of failure that would prevent many people from taking action.
But really, what is failure? Is it the opposite of success? The truth is, no. We have to learn to live with it, because throughout our lives we will make mistakes and fail many times. However, we will learn important lessons that will help us to try again with more enthusiasm and knowledge.
For Robbins, really failing is not trying. You fail when you don’t learn or don’t get up. According to him, the real mistake would be in not persevering, not learning, not taking care of every detail, not counting on human failure when planning, not doing everything on your part, etc.
Thus, Robbins concludes that permanent indecision is a serious mistake. Immobility leads to mediocrity, fear, and unhappiness. Sometimes we will succeed, sometimes we will not. But that a relationship or a business goes badly, does not imply that this has to always be the case: the past influences the future, but does not determine it. So stop making excuses, make decisions and do your best to enjoy the journey regardless of your destination.
