The Feeling Of Failure: A Painful Emotion
Who has never failed at something? Who has not felt the feeling of failure? The truth is that we have all felt defeated at some point in our lives.
The feeling of failure is often intense, vital, painful, and sometimes beneficial for personal development. One suffers with failure, but many things can be learned from it if this experience is faced with determination, courage and the will to improve.
The feeling of failure is a bitter experience
What is failure? We are talking about a feeling associated with not achieving expected short or long-term goals. It is accompanied by a bitter, unpleasant and frustrating experience. We have all had to face that experience. It is part of life, the other side of the coin, the other side of success?
In this sense, it is good to distinguish between the feeling of failure in the face of a real failure or setback and the feeling that occurs for no reason. Thus, the first refers to the experience of a failure, where it is important to clarify some aspects: the intensity, the coherence with the fact that triggers it and the way of reacting.
On the other hand, it is normal for the person, after the initial moments, to reason about the reasons for their failure. Then you will be able to overcome it and prevent it from happening again. An overly intense reaction that lasts too long or becomes unproductive is abnormal.
Our personality influences how we handle failure
When it comes to reacting to failure, personality is one of the main factors to take into account. In this sense, strong and mature personalities are characterized by activating all their defense mechanisms and overcoming the setback in a positive way. The weakest and most insecure personalities tend to break down on relatively small pitfalls. They need a lot more outside support to overcome them.
On the other hand, there are feelings of failure that are not justified, they are imaginary failures. Things can go relatively well for us and we feel dejected and depressed, unable to resolve the slightest setback. Sometimes we have the feeling of failing and having failed in a general way or in something very specific. We refer, thus, to an imaginary failure. This feeling of failure starts with feelings of inferiority and worthlessness or accompanies bouts of depression.
And it is that, during depression, there is a vital sinking that can be accompanied by this sensation and that falls within the field of pathology. There are no valid reasons: the starting point of this feeling is not real or logical.
The failure syndrome
The failure syndrome is the permanent feeling of having failed, of not having achieved anything. The failure feels that he has no chance. This syndrome affects the past, the present and remains in the future.
It can be the result of both real and imaginary reasons, but the result is always that the person feels dissatisfied with himself and with his life. An almost expected reaction is to sink into frustration, resignation and abandonment.
This is one of the most discouraging experiences that can be suffered and the person becomes an inoperative being. The person plunges into sadness and the inability to overcome himself.
The unsuccessful person loses the initiative, the ability to fight, the resistance to eventualities, falls into depressive phases and may wish to die. Not infrequently alcoholism and drug addiction become the only escape routes.
Overcoming failure is possible
Faced with failure, there are those who feel sunk and defeated and those who draw strength from weakness and quickly get back on track. Failure is not the end of the world, nor is it the end of what has failed. This is the starting point of improvement.
We must analyze failure and discover its causes. These causes can be excessive goals, little or little effort invested, little preparation, excessive demands, etc. The best thing is for you to know your own mistakes, correct and overcome your mistakes and plan new behavior and action strategies.
Remember, failures are likely to be overcome. The feeling of failure is temporary and it is in our hands to allow this situation to be established permanently. Thus, with certain actions we only learn after performing them poorly.
