5 Phrases That Hurt Your Partner

Having discussions as a couple is perfectly normal. Who does not have them? If they do not exist, it is because the relationship is probably very distant and cold; so much so that there is not even room for recriminations. Where there is love, there is also a bit of hatred and this need not worry anyone.

That said, it should also be noted that it is one thing to get angry and kick for a while, and quite another to throw expressions with high aggressive content, which can seriously hurt your partner.

If the expressions of anger revolve around some disagreement or concern, they can cause tension, but not deep wounds. On the other hand, if the tone of the conflict rises and the messages are directed not to express an annoyance, but to degrade or disqualify your partner, the matter becomes complicated.

Next we will tell you what are those expressions that you should avoid at all costs, if you want to maintain a healthy relationship.

Shut!

The silences imposed are highly aggressive. Preventing another person from saying what they think or feel is equivalent to canceling it completely. There is no valid reason for you to demand that your partner stop talking, saying something nonsense or something that confuses you.

If you don’t feel able to listen to that person, simply ask them to suspend the conversation and resume after both of you are calmer.

Your demand that he shut up will most likely be unsuccessful and will instead end communication between the two of you.

Offensive adjectives

Well they say that “the tongue is the only muscle that breaks bones. ” A person’s self-esteem is seriously damaged when they are referred to as “dog,” “bitch,” “moron,” “slug,” or similar terms.

Offensive adjectives have no other purpose than to humiliate the other. They seek to diminish it, lower it and, sometimes, even strip it of its personhood. That is why the name of one animal is even used to offend the other.

Those kinds of adjectives are a low blow in an argument. They cause anger and pain in those who receive them and, surely, guilt in those who generate them.

The threats

One of the quickest ways to lose respect between two people is to end the relationship every time a problem arises, and then regret it after the reconciliation.

“This is over!” It is one of the phrases that can appear when a couple argues. If you are not willing to really finish, you better not say anything. If you do, it is because you do not really want to solve a problem, but rather to manipulate your partner with the threat of abandonment.

Of those threats, there is only a resentment in the other and a lack of credibility in you. With this, communication is flawed and marked by the idea that words have no value. That they are said to say them and that nothing should be taken seriously.

Insults against the family

Speaking ill of the other’s family is also one of those cheap blows that give rise to strong resentments. Phrases like “you look more and more like your mom”, “I hope you don’t end up being a failure like your brother” are unacceptable.

These phrases are evidence that there is a strong desire to attack, not to defend an opinion or a way of acting. Their intention is to hurt and, for that very reason, they only end up increasing the problem, whatever it may be.

I can not stand you!

To declare that your partner is unbearable is equivalent to affirming that their way of feeling, thinking or acting has no place in your emotional world. It is a form of rejection with a high affective component.

Expressions like this generate a strong block in the communication of the couple. They involve great difficulty in achieving mutual acceptance and a refusal to understand.

It is normal for a couple to have difficulties and that sometimes they rise in tone. But to maintain your good mental health and build a valuable relationship, you must avoid anger leading you to send messages that will surely have serious consequences in the future.